An Elul update from my heart

On coaching, not using AI to mediate my heart, and all we can learn by not winning.

It’s been a long time since I’ve posted here… or anywhere, really. Since my last substack post, which I sent to a limited audience in January, I’ve written novel snippets, journal entries, newsletter drafts and even poems, but until now nothing has made it off my computer.

For me 2025 has been like facing a tidal wave, from inside a little boat I’m barely keeping afloat. Personally and professionally, I’ve struggled. I’ve cried. I've failed at things that mattered a lot to me, due to circumstances that felt out of my control.

And because I know it’s the only way to move forward, I’ve done my best to learn and grow from everything… hard as that sometimes is.

Here’s a secret I’ve slowly discovered this year: in my life, I’ve often created amazing things to try to justify my own worth as a human being living on this planet. But as I learn to trust in my own value as a person, a child of Hashem — distinct and apart from what I’m creating — I can take care of myself and my family without feeling quite as guilty for taking up space in the world. And hopefully, what I actually create will be more valuable to all the people who use it, because it’s less burdened by my own need to be loved.

Recently I’ve also been struggling with writing and AI. All of a sudden, almost everyone — my mentors and friends, rabbis and Jewish leaders who inspire me, and even my college-aged son — seem to be writing with the help of an AI tool. They say it saves time and enables them to write more, and ultimately to do more. It has made me feel a little foolish for not using it better myself.

But AI-assisted writing hasn’t worked for me. At first glance the result seems plausible, but when I look closer it’s not quite what I meant to say. Writing is not only my brain — it is also my heart. And so, feeling a bit like a dinosaur, I’ve decided I’m not going to use AI to write this newsletter or anything else. Maybe it will be less clean; maybe I’ll take more time to write it. But it will be my own truth, and that feels especially important right now.

I’d love to hear from your heart, too.

I suppose all this is a long way of getting to the life update I came here to share, which is that I’ve enrolled myself in a six-month Jewish program to become a transformative life coach. The program is offered by coach and teacher Rivka Malka Perlman (and if anyone wants to join me, jump in! Registration closes this weekend).

From the time I declared myself a “heroine whisperer” after The Prophetess was published, I’ve been writing and teaching to empower others to step into their greatness. But I also began to have a wispy dream of being an actual coach — trained and certified to support people one on one. My little dream has grown louder and louder in the intervening years, until it became a deep longing this summer. I guess that’s what a calling feels like? I pray that with G-d’s help, this will truly be the time to make that happen.

Over the coming months, I hope to share a bit of what I’m learning with you. And at some point I think I’ll also be looking for practice coachees, so let me know if you are interested.

Since it’s the Jewish month of Elul, with its mindset of growth and teshuva/return, I also wanted to share two opportunities to grow into your own gifts.

On Thursday September 11, 8-9:30PM ET, I’ll be delivering my Bring Your Inner Heroine to Life class online for The Wilderness Collective. The class is free and open to all women. Registration is required. Even if you have done this work in a prior year, I encourage you to participate again to see how your gifts and your calling have shifted. Remember, you can grow into one gift, and another, and another — that’s the tremendous blessing of being alive. Register here.

If you can’t join us or would prefer to work on your own, the Heroine’s Journal: A Jewish Mystical Journey of Growing Into Your Gifts is also available as a free download on my website. Print your own copy here.

Recently it has felt to me that everything in the world is upside down. But my sharing my heart with you is still real (and not AI-mediated). Let’s stay connected, even and especially in times like this, OK? Sending you love in these tumultuous times.

And may we share simchas,

Evonne

P.S. You can always find The Prophetess and the Grow Into Your Gifts Bat Mitzvah Package, as well as my recent writings, interviews and articles blending Jewish wisdom with personal growth and empowerment, on my website.

P.P.S. Cyberspace being what it is, this email may have been flagged as spam in your inbox. I promise, it's really me, having constructed most of this post while in the shower and then writing and editing it over two nights before and after my child’s bedtime. (No bot would know that but you do, right?) If you want to see more messages from me, please let your email service know I'm real and writing to you from my author account, evonnewrites@gmail.com.